What About Me???

The preceding entries were about Rob, Rob, Rob and how he consumes my life. And If I published older entries from 2006, they would be about my ex-husband Matt, Matt, Matt.

This is supposed to be a personal growth blog, so let me keep the focus on me. My new cognitive behavioral therapist wouldn't even let me talk about Rob when I saw her. It's not meant to be talk therapy. It's meant to be behaviorally based; which is good, because I'm sick of talking at this point.

I ordered a book about thoughts and feelings, a cognitive behavioral approach. This is invaluable in dealing with addiction. No amount of journaling, reasoning, redirecting, etc. is helping, and the addiction to relationships is getting worse. Any sickness can get worse if not effectively treated.

The first thing that jumped up at me from the book was "automatic thoughts." When something happens, our brain immediately registers it, often times not in a healthy way. I was able to use this automatic thought awareness and interrupt it this past weekend. I'm very hopeful that if I really dive into this book, I can get myself healthy and find a healthier person. Or even more unbelievably, be by myself!